teh 9roMu
[XXXtreme Machine is stood outside the Hamptonshire Country Club trying his best to get past a security guard eating a watercress sandwich.]
Security Guard: I’m sorry sir, this is a privately owned establishment.
XM: byt 1 m T harrkoah#!1
[A gray haired individual in a magenta robe steps beside the guard.]
Chester Hamptonshire: It’s ok Percy, let me give this gentleman a tour of the grounds.
Security Guard: Yes Mr. Hamptonshire.
[The security guard munches down the last of his sandwich with a frown as Chester escorts XXXtreme Machine along the side of the building.]
Chester: These are our grounds, over there you will see both our tennis courts and outside squash courts, and over here you will see our esteemed golf course where we had respected professionals such as Seve Ballesteros and Nick Price compete in our annual tournaments.
XM: dib u hef tehgo wudfz hur~?
Chester: Oh my no, we do not allow negroes on the premises.
XM: vatd reisisd!!”
[Chester Hamptonshire clears his throat.]
Chester: And if you will follow me I will escort you to our swimming baths.
[XXXtreme Machine follows back towards the main building. They walk through a large set of double doors into a white tiled atrium with an azure pool set in the middle of the floor.]
Chester: We have only the finest water flew over to us from the alpine springs to make our swimming pools. I hope this isn’t too forward a question to an individual such as yourself, but if you have a bathing suit with you I must ask if you would care for a dip?
XM: y vuken faj~! t wund tecc muh crovez ufv!!3
Chester: Oh my, I only meant for you to change in our elegantly designed black marble changing rooms and swimming a few laps. I meant no lewd connotations of which you speak.
[XXXtreme Machine hits a weak ass punch to Mr. Hamptonshire and runs back out through the door.]
XM: veez fug9E puth poopul eynt gnu ruyehp ne!1
[XXXtreme Machine runs through the grounds, avoiding the sprinklers and horse laughs of rich people, back to the main gates. The security guard from earlier raises an eyebrow.]
XM: 2huz pr4f sui hllee~~~!
[XXXtreme Machine punches the security guard and props him up on the head of a marble statue. XXXtreme Stunner on the security guard!]
XM: xxXtrim mssjiim si gyh b teh nekz unri wohlt shumpyun hdet mu7tuhs#!
[XXXtreme Machine climbs into a golf cart and drives off into the sunset.]