Archive for March, 2009

Total Non-Action Wrestling iMPLOSION! #18 Results!

March 25th, 2009
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SIN CITY – Gluttons for Punishment 2 is right around the corner, but before we get to Brawlers On a Budget’s next On-Demand, the next two editions of iMPLOSION will feature FOUR title matches, all of which were drawn at random on Total Non-Action Wrestling iMPLOSION! #18! In the next month, BOB’s entire championship landscape could change.

Kid Pirate booked the following matches by pulling contenders out of his hat:

  • ONLY WORLD TITLE THAT MATTERS: Dr. Silaconne M. Plants (if he retains the title in the March Mayhem 2009 tournament) will face former two-time ONLY WORLD CHAMPION THAT MATTERS Sarah Whatbody!
  • Swiss Army Belt: Pirate will defend his title against Kobe Gyant!
  • The You Gotta Be Kidding I Ain’t Doing That, Are You Out of Your Frickin’ Mind T&A Hardcore XX Division Championship: Hamster Girl will defend her title against Death!
  • The Not Good Enough to Fight Alone Tag Team Titles: The Great and “XFactor” Pete Trable will defend their titles against the pairing of Steve Studnuts and Christian St. Christian.
  • In other action, Jerri Li will face Axl in a Great American Bash In Axl’s Skull Match!

Prior to the championship lottery-style drawing, which was supposed to be done by BOB’s Executive Producer Trey Vincent, Studnuts got some payback on his former friend by assaulting him with the Medium-Sized Bucket. Referee Vicky Jean, who was being forced into receiving a “public spanking” by Vincent, provided plenty of distraction for Studnuts to sneak into the ring and beat Vincent bloody with the bucket. What will Vincent’s response be? And will we ever see Vincent vs. Studnuts going one on one?

SMP & Death def. Gyant & Joe Bananas via pinfall thanks to some help from the newest member of the Entities of Destruction, Steel Chair! Steel Chair made its presence known by rappelling down on a zip line to lend Death a hand (figuratively speaking, of course). Pirate also interfered in this match, smashing a bottle of rum over Gyant’s skull, before Plants nailed Gyant with a Medigree into the glass.

Li defeated Tia Tarr via pinfall in a brutal no disqualification match that ended after Li tombstoned Tarr through a ringside table.

Also on this night, the Entities of Destruction continued to prepare for SMP’s alleged secret admirer, Joanie Laurer, by watching the infamous (disturbing) “One Night In Chyna” sex tape. Laurer is rumored to reveal herself (hopefully only figuratively) at Gluttons for Punishment 2 on BOB-On-Demand!

Axl & Sarah def. Christian & Scatman via disqualification after Li interfered, laying out both Sarah and Axl with a chair. The Fetish Freaks continued assaulting the new tag team of Axl and Sarah (a team Axl’s new manager Scotty Whatbody put together) until Pigeon ran in to make the save.

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Total Non-Action Wrestling iMPLOSION! #17 Results

March 18th, 2009
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SIN CITY – On Total Non-Action Wrestling iMPLOSION! #17, Steve Studnuts mystery tag team partner derailed Brawlers On a Budget’s plans to showcase the first-time ever meeting between Studnuts and Trey Vincent in the main event at MegaBrawl III: Season of the Witch this December.

That mystery partner? Vincent. BOB’s Executive Producer made his official return to BOB after a completely uneventful previous few months waiting for some other federation to get rolling.

Not Good Enough To Fight Alone Tag Team Champions The Great & “XFactor” Pete Trable def. Studnuts & Vincent in a non-title match when The Great pinned Vincent after a DDT on a chair. After announcing that there will be special random drawing for championship matches next week on iMPLOSION 18 (in addition to a “public spanking” of referee Vicky Jean), Vincent made his entrance, joining Studnuts to face BOB’s tag team champions. Vincent apparently threw the match after he made a deal with Trable in return for Cyborg Angelina X “lending Vincent a hand” at a rate of 200 strokes per minute.

Post-match, The Great and Trable has some problems of their own as several Mr. Fantastic clones, including Cyborg Mr. Fantastic, Chocolate Mr. Fantastic and Werewolf Mr. Fantastic, went on the warpath. No doubt these creations by mad scientist Dr. Poindexter are gunning for the tag team champions.

Sam, Sam the Dancing Yam def. Axl via pin. Axl had a rough night. Aside from getting kicked in the “yams” and losing his match, Axl also had to deal with the OWTTM number one contender, Kobe Gyant, who took out Axl’s agent, Tifa Witherspoon, to dinner using Axl’s credit card. By the end of the night, Axl was washing dishes to make up for the mess he made at the restaurant.

The You Gotta Be Kidding I Ain’t Doing That, Are You Out Of Your Frickin’ Mind T&A Hardcore XX Division Champion Hamster Girl def. The You Gotta Be Kidding I Ain’t Doing That, Are You Out Of Your Frickin’ Mind T&A Hardcore XX Division Title Belt via pinfall. While Hamster Girl was victorious, post-match Jerri Li led the Fetish Freaks (Scatman and Christian St. Christian) into the ring for a beatdown. Li wants the title badly. But before the trio could inflict any serious damage, Sarah Whatbody ran in from the announce table and cleared the ring. Could we be on our way to another violent confrontation between Jerri and Sarah who had numerous outstanding matches last year?

We also found out Gyant’s tag team partner will be Joe Bananas next week. The “Gyant Bananas” will face Entities of Destruction members ONLY WORLD CHAMPION THAT MATTERS Dr. Silaconne M. Plants (who thinks he’s finally figured out who his mysterious secret admirer is) and Death in tag team action. Gyant hit the first strike in this building feud when he Van Horninated a giant plastic banana into Death’s skull.

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