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Melting Cheese

March 17th, 2008

Kevin the Pyromaniac

[Kevin The Pyromaniac is seen in a bubble bath eating fresh fruit. His face is covered in puss oozing zits that just seem to get bigger and bigger. A lot of his body has swollen up due to severe burns. Kevin picks another piece of fresh fruit from a mesh bag and puffs his chest and stomach out and places it on the crease between.]

Kevin: This is like a nightmare, who would have thought a human firewood match could end so disgustingly. I kinda liked it, but that one guy who jumped on some dudes stomach and made him puke was pretty fucked up.

Bobo: At least it shows you have guts.

Kevin: Bobo, you’re just a bloody monkey who smells worse than a necrophiliac’s wet dream.

Bobo: Thanks. Anyway, how will you compete in BOB after this? That had to be as bad a match as you had in you.

Kevin: Probably. I’m not sweating it, they need stupid guys like me to take those risks. Hell, I can’t even read the directions on a packet of gravy… but I guess I am only 17.

Bobo: It’s all that punishment you’ve taken to the head, you just need to relax on a beach somewhere and look up at the sky.

Kevin: I’m too hardcore, I’d rather go to prison.

[Kevin pops his pimples and introverts into himself like some sort of chess game that never ends. The bubbles splatter against the white tiles on the wall as Bobo the monkey does some DIY with a hammer and nails and a smile on his face.]

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