BOB eWrestling | Rant Zone Archive!

['All Or Nothin' by Three 6 Mafia is playing on a stereo as Joe watches a horse race on a scratchy television set out of the corner of his eye. He moves his chips into the middle of the table without looking.]

Tyrrell: Put the game on man.

[One of the other players flips the channel to a basketball match with a smile. Tyrrell slams his fist on the table like he's got all aces and moves his chips to the center with a head full of steam.]

Tyrrell: You motherfuckers don’t stand a chance.

Jamal: What you talkin about Tyrrell? You’re the broke ass kid.

[Tyrrell flips the bird and waves a roll of dollars about in the air.]

Tyrrell: I was born into this gambling shit.

Joe: Who’s got the blunt?

[Jamal passes a cigar over to Joe who takes a big puff with a heady smile.]

Joe: You crack heads are just eggs in my breakfast.

[He lays down a full house whilst taking a big hit.]

Joe: Spit that humble shit.

Tyrrell: Joe, do actually wrestle for them brawler motherfuckers, or do you just make and lose your God damn money off us?

[Joe's expression falls to pieces and his chin drops.]

Joe: Don’t bring me down, I just won.

[Tyrrell bends his arm over his head in his Hawks jersey.]

Tyrrell: We’ll walk all over you next game, loan shark.

[We cut to the fluorescent light above before fading out.]

Joe Bananas rant e-fed, e-wrestling, Joe Bananas, parody, wrestling