BOB sucks (unedited version, since BOB sucks)
OK scrubs, really simple promo today. You ain’t worth the effort. Where am I? On the road. Where are you? I don’t know and I don’t wanna know.
Here’s the deal. Everyone in Totally Face sucks. I hate your show. And I don’t want to defend my title against you scrubs. Brandon. Jean Bannister.
And Kurt Angel? You suck. HUh? You suck. Huh? That’s right. You suck. And everyone in BOB sucks. Our plan is working. Nobody gives a rat’s asshole about promoing here anymore. So everyone’s gonna job, cuz I’m booking the shows bitches. You all suck. Except for the damn Totally Face show. How did they steal the booking power from Polar. DAMN IT!
Doesn’t matter.
The iAd rules. Deal.
Get it?
This promo? It sucks.
This fed? It sucks.
Stop watching.
Stop I say.
Why aren’t you stopping.
Stop now.
Ah, I know I’m far too captivating to turn off.
Well FUCK YOU.
Go away.
Really!
DIE!
Fine, I don’t really mean it. Watch me. Live through me. For I will one day not only be your sports entertainment icon, but your God as well.
While the Pope may be God’s right hand man, I’m God’s favorite sports entertainer. And if you don’t believe me, I’ll bust a Bible in your ass!