Straight Outta Jobton
[Video opens with a still shot of Dyslexic Avenger, Mr. X, Bivalve, Super Mollusc and Nixon standing behind Sleazy-C in a line. They are all dressed in black (black long-sleeve shirts, black jeans, and though you can't see them, no doubt black boots. They're all wearing black hats too. Mr. X's hat has an X on it. And Sleazy has his usual shades on, but he has an LA Dodgers cap on to be different. They all exhale and some sort of smoke comes out their mouths. Don't ask, just assume what it is. It's a 'rap' group, what you think they be smoking?]
Sleazy C: You are now about to experience the weakness of ring fillaz.
[Some rap beats begin as on screen come the credits for the video:
J.W.A.
"Straight Outta Jobton"
(Trey Vincent, Sleazy-C)
Director: Trey Vincent
Talentless Recordz
The scene cuts to some run-down city, which we can assume is Jobton. The posse walks down some crummy ass road with abandoned cars and old ugly burnt out graffitied buildings with boarded up windows. Mr. X comes to the front of the pack and begins to lip synch to the words.]
Mr. X: Straight outta Jobton
Talentless little jobba named Mr. X
Been years since I got any kinda sex
Where the hell is the notoriety
No wonder I can’t master sobriety
If I want some real action
I head to a Star Trek convention
‘Captain Kirk loves to fuck fat boys,’ I scream
Plenty of fat loserz wanna fight with me
Then I got to BOB and SE with tumbleweed
No pop if I fall, win or bleed
Apathy
Phuck me
A man with no gimmick
The BigBOSS makes me sick
Hey Sculder, hey Mully, look at me now
No doubt you three bitchez gonna pay now
Cuz I’m straight outta Jobton!
[More rap beats beat.]
Voice/sample thing: City of Jobton, city of Jobton.
[Sleazy appears between Super Mollusc and Bivalve and shoves them toward the camera. He then shoves X backward and threatens him with a PP-47. X retreats.]
Sleazy: Yo boyz!
SM + B: Whazzup?
Sleazy: Tell em whatz up!
B: Keep sending us to Alaska
SM: Pay us in fish? How dare ya!
B: Now the JWA is going to the top
SM: We got the plastic, the jobbins gonna stop
B: No angles, no gimmicks or crowds
SM: BOB has failed us jobbaz, be proud
B + SM (together): Until you’re smellin all pissy
Yeah Boss, you’re too buzy
Jobbaz sick of the slave treatment
100 years of talent enhancement
Is gonna end!
It ain’t about cool, this ain’t no trend
We want the dollarz
You know its true if ya wanna follow
Get in line
It’s JWA time
B: I’m sick of being held down
SM: Working hick inbred towns
B: Arenas the size of apartments
SM: All to make precious cents
B + SM: After comin straight outta Jobton
[More rap beats beat.]
Voice/sample thing: City of Jobton, city of Jobton.
[Bivalve and Super Mollusc pull out their PP-47s and aim them at Sleazy.]
B + SM: Sleazy is his name and he’z comin straight outta Jobton
[Sleazy now leads the pack down the ugly ass road.]
Sleazy: I used to say no one can job az good az me
Now everybody better run from me
Ima entertain like neva before
Have money so I can phuck sum whorez
We got us a gimmick
We betta uze it!
And we’re gonna win muthaphuckas!
Don’t believe us, then you’re a stupid sucka
Spittin out deadly rhymes
All the phuckin time
Dissin all our fellow jobbin bitchez
On the road to JWA richez
Now I’m sick of bein a whore
TV wants us to be so much more
Big star, sportz entertainaz
Not these low-class moneyless jobbaz
Gonna buy me some cars and hos to go with
Serving up shots of vodka by the fifth
Drunk as phuck and proud soon to be
The JWA, straight outta Jobton, with me
[More rap beats beat.]
Voice/sample thing: City of Jobton, city of Jobton.
[The JWA crew shoots their PP-47s at some ho walking down the road. It's the bridge, thus, no lyrics. They laugh and point at her and keep on walking. Dyslexic Avenger takes the lead spot now.]
DA: Under I’m of sick
Over wanna be I
Me push!
Here the is talent
Straight outta Jobton
Entertainer superhero sports
With along my cohorts
AWJ. Life. For.
Sleazy: BITCH!
Voice: Jobton!
[Nixon runs up front and puts his face right in the camera with his weapon.]
Nixon: I look a bit like a former president
I should get a ho who looks a bit like a former intern
Hey Monica’s likeness, got sumthin you can take
A little dictation under the desk
My office ain’t in Washington
DC ain’t the place to be
My place is in my new hometown
The land of citizens held down
The future of this industry
Come suck me while you can
Cuz once I’m gone, I’m gone….
Straight outta Jobton
[Rap beats come to an end. The group celebrates and high-fives.]
Sleazy: Damn, that shit stunk!
[Fade to black.]