More unethical behavior…
–”Charlie” and his two charges, Viet Kong and Blackjack Hooligan, have just left yet another topless bar… this one called “YOU CAN BARELY SEE THE ENHANCEMENT SCARS” down on Something Ave. and Anywhere Ln. The camera focuses in on the trio as the enter a cab…–
Cabbie: “Where to fellas?” (looks in the rearview) “What tha hell?”
“Charlie”: “AH SOOKIE! HELLRO YOO STOOPID CABBEE! Doon’t bee ararmed by-ee awr appeeronce…WEE RASSLURS!”
Cabbie: “Yeah, okay…whatever.”
Blackjack Hooligan: “Whatta matta, laaaaadie? You doon’t believe tha little man you doon’t? Doo ya REAL-ly think I’d be a wearin’ this for nuddin’?”
Cabbie: “Are you guys…like gay or something?”
“Charlie”: “Yoo wanna see gay-ee? Yoo bettur rook at Roomp Ranjur een dee ESS TEE DUBBA YOO EFF…DAT BOYEE FRAMIN’!”
Cabbie: “You mean flaming, right?”
“Charlie”: “Dat wha mee sayee. Yoo goot heerin’ probrem?”
Cabbie: “Look man, I don’t want any problems…I just drive a cab, a-ight? Where ya’ll going?”
BH: “We be a goin’ too dat new tittee bar doown oon It Dooesn’t Matta Dr. an’ a Maybe Yoouv’e Heard ‘O It Boulevard called “Free Ripple and Quarter Size Nipple”…an’ step oon tha gas ya will…my alcohol level be a dippin’ beloow it nor-MAL standards it is. Noot too mention me tallywacker be a needin’ soome attention. AYE! It shoor dooes, laaaaaadie.”
Cabbie: “You guys ARE gay aren’t you? Hey, does the guy in the black hood ever talk?”
(Kong stares at him)
“Charlie”: “Noo, him nev-a haff too sayee ENYDING! Him doo awl him tarkin’ een dee reeng.”
Cabbie: “Tarkin’?” What the hell does that mean? Hey, we’re here. Look guys, I was going to have you sign this waiver because you’re currently being filmed for Taxi Cab Confessions #78…but I can’t use any of this sh!t for the show. Matter of fact, don’t even pay me for the ride. Get your sh!t, your stupid looking costumes, and get the funk out of my cab!”
“Charlie”: “WEE AWN TACKY CAB CONFESSON?! MEE ROVE DAT SHOO! Especiree ween dey goot beeches awn dere dat tark aboot…
Cabbie: “GET OUT!”
“Charlie”: “HEY! Mee, “Charrie”, charrenge dat midjet dat hang aroon’ Jussin Voss rike dingolberree! DAT’S RIGH! Yoo enterfeer een Viet Kon may-che…YOO AN’ MEE RITTLE BEEG MAN…AT NEER DEFF EXPEERIONCE! SOOKIE!”
Cabbie: “GET THE FUC……”
–Quick cut to static-